Saturday Night Shenanigans

Wow, I apologize for being MIA for so long. Life has been busy and has been flying by. I cannot believe that it is the end of April already. Where did the year go? Anyways, I am back, and will be posting frequently again. As for this post, I am going to be writing about some Saturday night Shenanigans. In my last post I wrote about how people here in the Midwest confuse girlfriend vs girl friend. Particularly one of LWB's coworkers (who we will call Connie) who she has already tried to come out to. However, Connie, for some odd reason, just does not get it. I am still in shock she has not figured it out. So, on Saturday night I went out with LWB to one of her coworkers birthday celebrations. I know a few people from her program so I knew that I would at least have people to talk to and hang out with. We picked up Connie, who insisted on getting to the bar right on time, and went to meet everyone else. We were obviously there very early because who gets to a bar on time after pregamming at the house first. Oh right, you guess it..no one!

Since it was a nice night we decided to grab a drink and sit outside. I went in with Connie to get the first round, a beer for each of us. We sat down and I am pretty sure in a matter of about 5 to 10 minutes Connie's beer was gone! Now, I had also drank my beer pretty quickly but wow, Connie was already heading in by herself to grab round 2. This drinking pattern of pounding beer continued on for a while, leading to about 7ish beers in a one hour. Before I knew it things got sloppy. She was walking around shouting like a high school student about how "intoxicated" she was.

We were all feeling pretty good and having a great time and decided to head to the dance floor. Now, Connie was pumped because she had been dancing in the booth the whole time while pounding beers and telling everyone she was "SOO intoxicated." As we began dancing I noticed how close Connie was to me. Kind of following around while trying to grind with me. I would turn my back, and still feel her grinding. I would walk away and before I knew it, there she was...humping me again. I knew that A noticed this and found it very humorous. She instantly grabbed my camera and starting taking pictures. I have one picture in particular of Connie looking so happy and me very concerned.

Now, it wasn't the fact that another girl besides LWB was dancing with me, it was more how unsexy Connie was, and how SHE thought it was so incredibly sexy to dance with another girl, and how the boys probably thought she looked great! When in reality she was a sloppy mess, following me around the dance floor, all over me. Way more than LWB was even close to dancing with me. After this unfortunate dance floor incident, we all went back upstairs to sit in a booth, have a beer and just hang out. I was sitting diagonally from Connie. I noticed she kept leaning all over one of the boys we were sitting with. Then kind of lying sideways on the booth, almost passing out. One time I called her out and told her she was definitely going to pass out in the booth. She then replied with "I have never once passed out, I will not in the booth!" Now, she did not say this in a mean way, she just wanted to let me know that she could handle her alcohol and she was FINE!

Now, I am chuckling at her response because of what happened about 5 minutes after she let me know she is a champ drinker. I happened to look back over at her, and noticed her hanging over the side of the booth....puking!! She did not even attempt to make it to the bathroom! Now being out of college, as LWB stated in her blog, puking over booths in a bar, makes for a poor scene. After I noticed her trowing up, I quickly jumped up and ran to get her and bring her outside. I pretty much pulled her from the bar, brought her outside and sat her in a chair. I then actually lectured her on the fact that pounding 7ish beers in one hour was NOT a good choice. Wow. There are actually a lot more incidents to report from a certain Connie from that night, but it's too much. I just wanted to focus on the dancing and puking parts. The dancing and being ALL OVER me was just weird, especially for someone who is so oblivious to a relationship that is right in front of her! And because she gets jealous when LWB leaves the office to hangout with me...or really anytime she knows that LWB and I are hanging out.

As a tribute to drunk Connie, here is a video of random acts of hilarious drunkenness and a tribute to a Sloppy Saturday Night! Enjoy!



It's great to be back!! Peace!